I consider myself an attractive, charming, confident woman. I am also self sufficient, motivated, goal orientated, hard working, God loving and honest. Indeed I have a failed marriage…well, discarded marriage, but I know what I want and I'm not afraid to go after it. So why is it so difficult to find a good man?
Before I attempt to answer that question, let me define what I think a good man is. A good man, is attractive, charming, self sufficient, motivated, goal orientated, hard working, God loving and for the most part, honest (at least with himself and his Creator); basically someone with the same values as mine just packaged as a man. So again I ask, why is that so hard to find? I’ll tell you why; and it starts with supply and demand.
Now, I tell myself no lies; I know there are women out there that are probably prettier than I am, with bigger booties and smaller waists, but I know for a fact that most of those women are asking the same question.
I was sitting in my kitchen talking to my eldest daughter about my ex husband. I noted how much of a headache it is to get my son’s father to provide for our child and continue to be a part of his life. I mean, it’s less stressful to work extra hours, sell a few more cakes and finagle arrangements with my debtors in order to solely provide for my son than it is to chase his father down for his contribution. It’s easier to miss sleep working late hours than it is to miss sleep arguing on the phone with my ex husband about why the money he promised me to buy his son a coat never materialized. At least the former pays for my time! But this is where the problem lies and supply and demand comes into play.
As women, we can take on just about anything. We survive it all. From being able to withstand the pain from the shifting of our bones and internal organs to allow a whole person to fit through, to our never-ending battle for equal rights; we make shit happen.
I mean, we just don't quit. History has shown that if men stop providing for us and our offspring (whether it be by choice or by force), we don’t keel over and die; we do what we have to do to maintain. It takes a lot for a woman to just waste away without even trying. We are living sources of strength and ingenuity and we know how to use it. But unfortunately we have a weakness; our male counterpart. Even though we are conditioned to not need men, we still need men!
|Curtesy of FaceInTheHole.com|
Let me be clear, I’m talking in general here. For all you women that have sworn off men, if you wanted to make a baby you need sperm. And if you have no plans of having children then I almost envy you, because my desire for our human counterpart is so intense that I (and many other women like me) have made it way too easy for them to get what they want.
It’s so valuable to me that in making it easy for myself to get those things, I’ve made it easy for him to enjoy everything I have to offer. And I am not alone. The new and improved twenty-first century independent woman has tipped the scales of supply and demand in the favor of the male. In the old days, a man had to prove himself worthy of a woman's affection by demonstrating that he could supply a foundation: financial security, emotional support and social standing. In addition, the presence of a young woman's father only made the screening process more difficult for a suitor. But because events in history have put women in the position where we’ve had to fend for ourselves, and consequential to the increased presence of fathers who aren't present, men seem to think that he no longer has to serve his purpose; and can you blame him? I’m going to play the devil’s advocate here. If you were a person that at one point had to pay your way to gain access, then suddenly one day you no longer had to pay but still gained not only access, but VIP treatment, what would you do?
It’s as if I and the majority of females, have been installed with some kind of fail safe in favor of the opposite sex. I can never get too big for my britches because what they have is of too much value to me.
It’s a shame really; the male species has figured out a way to devalue what they hold the most dear. How can the very thing that men have risked their livelihood for, fought wars over and in some cases died because of, cause them to look at it as if it’s nothing? What would men do without the Yoni? (If they don’t keel over and die, they certainly will no longer be born ´\_('~')_/`). We have demand for what they supply and vice versa, but though they have a demand of what we supply, we don’t demand much for them to get it. It’s as if we pay them to give them a discount. Isn’t that crazy?And if we demand our fair value, we are labeled as gold diggers, prostitutes and the worst of all (gasp), old fashioned! Oh no, the modern woman can’t be old fashioned! How could she? The female CEO for a company cannot be expected to run the company and still expect a man to open the door for her or pick her up at her residence before a date. She dare not be in a position of power in the boardroom and put a date stamp on when a man can get her in the bedroom. Her sexuality has to remain under her control, and if she puts guidelines like the three date rule on her sex life and it takes three months to go on three dates, how is she going to release the stress built up from managing men who constantly try to tear her down at work by denying herself sexual gratification? Ugh! Get me off this merry-go-round, please?!
From marriage dowries to transference of inheritance, men have put a dollar value on women for centuries.
I propose that rather than fight the monetization of the V, we embrace the fact that men value things with a high price tag. Don't get it twisted. I'm not talking about prostitution (I'll save that for another conversation) or pussy equity. I'm talking about acknowledging the fact that a good woman is so valuable that she is in fact invaluable and cannot be price stamped, discounted or sold second hand like a Birkin bag. Yes, I'm talking about demanding that men make more of an effort than paying their monthly subscription to Netflix (and even then, they are more than likely signing into someone else's account). I'm talking about that even if the dude has no funds, he invest sweat equity to get the buns. Fellas, If you don't have enough cash to take your girl to the opera, then mofo, you better put on a performance written, directed and starring you!
Ladies we have to demand more for ourselves. And we have to demand it together. Every woman that lowers the price of her personal stock decreases the market value for everyone else.
Let's get in formation please, so that our daughters, grand-daughters and great grand-daughters can live in a world where their value is never in question.